The Talker

 

December 23, 2009 
VIDEO GALLERY
PHOTO GALLERIES
COMMENT ON A STORY
ACROSS CANADA
WORLD WATCH
LATEST BREAKING NEWS
WEIRD NEWS
CRIME
POLITICS
FEATURES
SCIENCE
GREEN NEWS
GOOD NEWS
U.S. ELECTION
TECHNOLOGY
Sun Papers
Columnists
Lotteries
Weather
RSS Feed
Have you ever 'defriended' someone on Facebook?
Yes
No


Results | Story


Seeing is believing?
By THANE BURNETT, QMI Agency




The world is obsessed with Hollywood, so why shouldn't we trust the movies to point out the many ways our story could end?

Here are the top ten ways scriptwriters choose to seal our doom -- and reasons why we'll survive.

1. Alien invasion

While they'll likely just get the flu and die (War of the Worlds) we'd just need to show them John Travolta's Battlefield Earth and they'd leave us in peace.

2. Nuclear War

While once at the top of the fear charts in the days of Dr. Strangelove, this old favorite has dropped down the list in recent years. The countdown always seems to stop with just seconds to spare.

3. Resources Dry Up

Mad Max saw a world where the loss ofenergy resources turned us into gangs of thieves and murderers. But if weekend shopping in a big box store hasn't turned us that way by now, nothing will.

4. Zombies

Always a popular way to end the world, it's clear all you have to do to survive is either a) run or b) hit them hard on the head.

5. Killer Computers

While artificial intelligence may hold menace in the worlds of The Terminator and The Matrix, here in reality, most modern computers regularly crash and our cell phones keep hitting dead zones.

6. Pandemic

Will a 12 Monkeys-type virus wipe us out? Na, we can always use time travel to go back and find a cure.

7. Global Warming/Cooling

While Waterworld and The Day After Tomorrow may make us say "no" to plastic, we'll ultimately survive by counting on survival techniques learned in Scouts and Guides. You were a Guide or Scout right? Oh, crap.

8. Geomagnetic Screw-up

In The Core, Earth's magnetic field becomes messed up and everything goes wrong. For most of us, that's just another Monday.

9. Deep Impact

If Armageddon proved anything when it comes to a deadly impact with an asteroid, it's that America will save us all.

10. Solar Activity

The sun attacks us in the movie 2012, but what we really should be keeping an eye on is that sneaky, no good moon.











Environment C-Health Galleries