Fed up with people asking him insensitive questions about his adopted daughter, a pastor in the U.S. didn't get mad, he created a funny tutorial that he posted online.
Billed as “a public service announcement from adoptive families everywhere,” Rev. Jesse Butterworth's YouTube video has been viewed more than 300,000 times.
"Sometimes very well meaning people will say some pretty insensitive things to adoptive families," Butterworth says on YouTube. "We can only assume that they're not trying to be mean, but instead lack the vocabulary to say what they're really asking.
"So that's why we came up with this rule of thumb: If you wouldn't say it about a boob job, don't say it about an adoptive family."
In the video, Butterworth says you wouldn’t ask a woman if her breasts are real, so you shouldn’t ask adoptive parents, “Is that your real daughter?” Instead, he suggests, it’s better to ask, "Is that your biological daughter?"
Butterworth and his wife Marisa are the parents of two biological sons. They adopted daughter Harper – who is almost two and was born in Ethiopia – a little over a year ago.
“The truth is, we’re not being sensitive for us. It doesn’t hurt my feelings — I’m trying to be incredibly protective of my daughter who doesn’t understand [the comments] yet," he told Today.com. "But at one point, she will and the last thing I want her to feel is that she is a lesser member of my family,” Butterworth said.